Make Moving Fun

We should be good at this by now. The U.S. Census Bureau reports that about one in seven Americans moves each year.

But some things never change. Parents still want to know how to help their kids feel "settled." Start by talking openly, recommends Thomas Olkowski, Ph.D., a member of the American Psychological Association (APA) and co-author of Moving with Children: A Parent's Guide to Moving with Children .

If kids bombard you with questions, answer them honestly, Dr. Olkowski says. If they clam up, share your feelings and provide them with opportunities to talk. Other tips Dr. Olkowski offers:

• Help your child adapt to the new community. Make it a point to find the neighborhood library, swimming pool, and pizza parlor.

• Help your child make new friends. Take family walks around your neighborhood. Ask about youth programs at your church or synagogue. Sign your child up for sports or extracurricular activities if he is interested.

• Visit your child's new school. Arrange a tour for your child, and ask the principal, guidance counselor, and teacher to help your child feel at ease.

• Ask your real estate agent for assistance. For example, Re/Max International offers a video to help kids survive moving. Some agents will send postcards to your new neighbors, informing them of the new family.

Other experts say you should assist your child in maintaining contact with friends back home. Letters and phone calls can be a comfort, especially to teens, says Laura Mee, Ph.D., an Atlanta child psychologist.

"Don't push. Kids usually make the transition just fine," says Frederic Medway, Ph.D., a University of South Carolina psychology professor emeritus. "A perfect example: A mother who moved recently recalls that her son circulated his phone number on his first day of school. His social life is off and running," she says.